The Cluckin' Times - 11 July 2016 Edition

The Endorsed KCNR Newspaper.
The Cluckin’ Times
This edition was published on July 11th, 2016. Cost: $4.38 and a dirty sock.
1. Update Highlights
2. Server News
3. S.W.A.T.
4. Suggestion Highlights
5. Frauds & Rulebreakers
6. Did You Know?
7. Advertisements
8. Weekly Question



Highlighted updates from June 28th - July 11th.
  • Lowered success rate of business robberies when businesses have a safe.
  • Lowered money robbed from business safes at a time.
  • A house / business can now only be robbed ONCE every 12 hours to prevent targeting.
  • Increased the minimum bribe amount to 10k, and the maximum bribe amount to 500k.
  • You can no longer bribe while being kidnapped or being a kidnapper.
  • Added a richest player (Kingpin) leaderboard.
  • Added plant fertilizers.
  • A warning that Los Santos is a RDM Zone is now sent to non-regulars when entering the city.
  • Lowered mechanic prices.
  • You now gain an instant warrant when sticking up a player.
Type /updates when in-game or visit the Server Changelog thread for all updates!



> Tiiggy, with help of Edmundxx, has been creating events in order to give away the 20 bonds he received during the Trailer Competition where he placed first place. If you’re lucky enough to participate, we wish you good luck in competing for them!

> Business / House robberies have been nerfed! Businesses are finally profitable with an amazing update added July 8th increasing the robbery timer to 12 real life hours, and lowering the amount and the success rate of businesses with safes. Buy a business located anywhere in KCNR and start making money!

> An insanely detailed event took place on July 8th Hosted by Edward here. With over 85 pastebins and an entire website dedicated to it, it took players almost 2 hours of constant work to complete. Scottish_Monkey was the first player to finish the event with Kruthal and Shane trailing not far behind for the grand prize of 18 Million. Part 2 of this competition is going to be released fairly soon and Edward suggested players complete the first part first in order to compete in Part 2. If you’re planning on participating in part 2, good luck as you’ll definitely need it.

Huge props to Edward for spending hours and his own money in order to create this amazing event for us. We all cannot wait for part 2.



> Henor, the Vice-Commander of SWAT, has requested ALL potential SWAT applicants to read this topic before applying for SWAT.
  • A FAILURE to follow the correct application format above will result in your SWAT App to be DECLINED and be given a 30 day BAR from S.W.A.T.
> Latest Promotions in SWAT:
  • Shane - Captain
  • iEatGroceries - Sergeant
Congratulations to both players!



> Here are some recently made suggestions that need a bit more love!
Want to make your own suggestion? Click here!



> Recently, R0BBER_007 scammed over 100mil from Snoxyes through a Real World Trade. After repeatedly lying to administration about the transaction, he was banned for an entire month and the full 100mil amount was removed from his account.

> Gopi_Krishnan’s account was permanently banned for selling his account to I3NY for a measly $4.

Need to complain a rulebreaker? Click here to post a complaint in the Court Of Justice!



> Nobody has passed Zenlex and Henor’s SWAT Test, hence the name The Thrash Duo. Think you can be the first to finally pass their test? Click Here to create an application. (You do need coprank 8 in order to apply!)



> xXSlayDriver1Xx is looking for a new Youtube profile picture, and is currently hosting a Youtube Profile Picture Contest. You can participate and win as much as 1 million in game cash!

For more information on his contest, click here

> Kruthal is selling bonds for $3.333mil. PM him in-game.

> Sycromatics is currently in the market for a Chainsaw dildo, a Cuban Cigar, and 2.9mil Bonds. PM him in-game for more details.

> Private Message [Rw]Joel today to get a FREE advertisement to be featured on next week’s Cluckin’ Times Edition.



> In the previous newsletter, the question we asked was:

How many warehouses, banks and casinos are there in total?

The answer was: 16

Congratulations to all 3 winners:
  • SpartanGladiator
  • Dimitri_Deville
  • xXSlayDriver1Xx
Here is a list of all Warehouses, Banks and Casinos in KCNR:

Code: Select all


Redsands West Warehouse
Creek Warehouse
Linden Side Warehouse
Ocean Docks Warehouse
Angel Pine Warehouse
Easter Basin Warehouse


Royal Casino Bank 
Las Barrancas Bank
Roca Escalante Bank


Four Dragons Casino
Royal Casino
Pink Swans Casino
Redsands West Casino
Roulette Casino
Caligula's Casino
The Clown’s Pocket Casino

For a total of: 16.
> Answer this question correctly to receive $1000000 (1m) in-game cash!

How many helicopters are there in total in KCNR?

To participate in this, complete the Google Form here!

If there are multiple winners, the prize will be split up. The winner will be announced in the next newsletter. Good Luck!



The staff at The Cluckin’ times appreciates you taking the time to read our paper each and every release. With new additions to the team, we’ve been trying out new categories and would love some feedback & suggestions on what to add. We’re planning on expanding the newspaper length but we need interesting categories to fill the space. We would like to add “Screenshot of the Week” or “Fail/play of the week” where YOU can send us your screenshots and video clips for us to showcase here on The Cluckin’ Times. In order to make the paper more entertaining, we’re looking for help from you guys on ideas on what you would like to see. Just throw suggestion in your reply below this post!

[Rw]Joel & Kruthal
Personal helicopters or what?
Not including personal helicopters.
Wow, I really like the new style, this actually makes the newspaper must-read every week.

The most important updates and suggestions, competitions, interesting news, This was probably the first one I read from the beginning to the end because it had no fillers such as horoscopes or boring lists. Keep it up, good job!
Now we're getting somewhere. Nice work Joel.
This new style is awesome. Good work on the newstopic Joel and Kruthal.

@Clucky I had removed horoscopes because it was completely bullshit when I made them(Yezpahr made relevant ones). In any way, removal of horoscopes made it less boring.
I smell jealousy from groceries.
Darkcloud wrote:I smell jealousy from groceries.
I left the team. There's no need for jealousy.
The credit should be given mostly to Kruthal :)
Question for the heli's do the news heli's count or nah reason why im asking is because the mission got removed